Grow up

What is time? Why can't we stop it? Why can't rewind time? Why can't I go back to the time when I was a little kid, playing on the field with my brother, and cousins. Running with the kite, chasing grasshopper, throwing firecrackers...go back to the time of simple life, no high tech device, no cellphone, no laptop, no cars, no HDTV, no bills...
But of course, time doesn't stop, and will never be. I'm now drowning in the ocean of loneliness. Feel like I need someone to talk to, but then I have nothing to tell, just need someone to hold hand and walk along the ocean, the ocean of loneliness. And yet, I'm stressing out right now. Life, love, and career.

As my dad developed heart failure recently, I feel stuck. Stuck in the depressing state, even though I try to be optimistic as much as I can, try to make my mom laugh. But I know once my dad's heart disease strikes again, my mom won't be laughing any more. She will cry, cry until she ran out of tears and probably gone away with my dad. Then I'll be here, in my room of an empty house, by myself with the sound silence and breathless. I guess that's how life is. I can't be a kid any more. I need to grow up. I need to create my own life, my own motivation and purpose of life, a reason to live for.
Làm gì thì làm, bây giờ đi ngủ trước cái hả